Chapter 5 (so far)

unBottled Combo

Hello Sparks!

I know it’s been a while, and I’m coming at you on a weird day of the week but life, ah life, you know how it goes.

Anyway, since things are starting to get interesting again, and this is the point where everything changes, I thought I’d unBottle a little bit before we continue.

First of all, did you happen to notice my unBottled Banner on the last episode?

Pretty huh?

My HUMAN artist is pretty awesome. I am quite proud to be supporting human art in these fraught times. I used to draw. I can’t claim to ever have been much good at it, but I do remember how much effort it is. I don’t have time to reteach myself how to make the images I wish I had to go along with this story, so why not support someone just starting out?

Anyway again, on a personal note—it’s harvest season. Soyabeans are finally done, now it’s maize and it’s taking FOREVER. Also, headsup, after the harvest, FINALLY, it’s my one chance in the year to get away for a few days. We are going to visit my parents who live by the sea. It’s an 800 km trip, which we will be making with three little ones in the back seat, because even with fuel prices what they are, it still costs more to fly five bodies than to drive one very full car… Wish me luck, please, I’m going to need it. And do share any tips you might have for travelling with kids.

Business time!

Ash and Cinders

We have four episodes to catch up so I’m giving you broad strokes, and embedded links, for brevity’s sake.

Coming To, has a very much hung over Logan waking up post empathic bridge. Elle is already improving, but it might take some time. A long and awkard month later, Elle is better, but not awake, and well, life goes on, until one day, exactly four years since they found her, Logan visits and something clicks.

Later, Elle wakes up, alone. She takes time to orient herself, reorder her mental map of what happened, and test out her body which feels strangely taller than she remembers. Some forms and ambivalent exploration later and she and logan are on a collision course to meet in the manor’s gym.

In Settling in, Logan finds Elle in the gym, and after a tense moment, she follows him to meet Luke, who has many questions, all the questions. Elle settles in to let Luke run his tests.

Family has Elle finally free to play, and play she does. She loses herself in the flow of her favorite activity, gymnastics highbars, until Logan comes to call her to her first family dinner. Needless to say, Elle doesn’t like surprises, and sporting a fresh bruise Logan is forced to endure his brother’s teasing while Elle, confused by her transgression being rewarded with a hug, continues her obsessive training.

Later, Logan successfully manages to invite her to dinner, and at last, she dares to let herself hope that the past is behind her.

Finally we have The Party. Total gear shift. Logan is writing a formal statement in General Morgan’s office, to explain the disaster that ensued when Elle crashed his twentieth birthday party, which they have been planning since before the ritual that helped Elle leave her desolate headspace.

Elle, amazed by all the new sights and sounds, happened upon a group of drunken soldiers at play and intrigued by the chance to show off, ran through an obstacle course designed to challenge experienced soldiers. Soldiers who didn’t appreciate being shown up by a brat. Elle, brat as she is, refused to take their insults lying down, and Tom is forced to knock her out before things get even more out of hand, but not before she puts six of them in hospital.

Now she’s in trouble. She broods, convincing herself she did nothing wrong, while Luke lectures her, all the while unaware that she’s just put herself on the PG’s watchlist, and the strings attached are about to pull tight.

These four episodes together form an arc of tentative trust. The small steps toward hope that let Misty finally start to believe things can be different here, and then the shattering when she realizes that she’s the one who needs to change.

Questions!

So many questions!!!

Okay I am going to limit myself to two per episode, or this is going to take forever.

For Coming To: It’s been a month since the ritual, why has it taken this long for Logan to come visit her? And Misty wakes up in the middle of the night, pulls out her own feeding tube and zaps the monitors into silence, like its Tuesday. Any idea why this seems so… Normal?

Settling in: Logan is confused by the fact that she’s apparently fine, why? Elle is confused by the fact that Logan is confused, and Luke treats her like a lab rat. She doesn’t complain. She doesn’t argue. What do you think Luke sees when he looks at her?

Family: Poor Logan! And, ah brotherly banter… How hard exactly does one have to kick to knock someone out like that, and judging by the reaction it got, did Elle do some damage after all?

The Party… Ah what a disaster. I ask just one question here. The big one.

Nerds Nook

Today I want to talk about POV discipline.

Now, I’ve done the unfair thing and asked you to remember that Logan and Misty aren’t always the most reliable narrators, but, as I’m sure you know, an unreliable narrator, from a craft perspective is one that lies. Misty and Logan aren’t actually lying. Their perspective is just LIMITED.

When you read Misty’s POV, you’re locked into her head. You see only what she sees, and feel only what she feels. The same goes for Logan. Now obviously, I’m not perfect, and there will be moments where some things bleed through, but as far as my self-taught skill allows, that’s what I’ve tried to do.

Misty is fascinated by a world that to Logan is mundane. Logan is weirded out by Misty’s complete lack of reaction to being treated like a lab rat.

Throughout this story I tried to stay inside each character’s respective head.

Now let me ask you, when a traumatized kid wakes up in a strange place, what do you expect them to do? Cry, beg, question? Misty is calm. She knows she’s out of danger, and so she goes along. what does that tell you about how she sees this situation?

Logan sees the way she stares in wonder, the impossible reflexes and power she has, and he thinks she’s incredible. He also asks what it took to instill that in a child.

What do you think Luke sees?

One more thing, POV discipline, lets you look at the world through a character’s specific spectacles. The things they accept, you the reader accept, the things they wonder at, you wonder at. That’s the point.

Think about the sci-fi element here. I know there’s not a lot that counts as hard Sci-Fi. A lot of what puts this story in its speculative genre may seem handwavy or soft magic, but I’ve tried to avoid dumping lore and science on you except where it fits into a character’s reverie, because to Logan and Misty, most of the magic is just—normal.

I could give you Luke’s POV, and a clinical breakdown of the mitochondrial energy mechanism or the energetic lattice that makes up the Vital Barrier around Misty’s cells, and I bet there are some of you who would find it fascinating, but I doubt it will do much to improve the story because although it is important to Luke, Misty couldn’t care less, and Logan cares more about her as a person than a biological entity.

But hey, if that kind of thing floats your boat… I’m open to requests.

That’s it — Nerdy friends.

Keep well.

—Jenny, out*

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Happy speculating, till the next time! I can’t wait, can you?

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